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Tuesday, May 24, 2005

New Week's Eager Faceplant

Assuming you subscribe to the theory that the week begins on Sunday, my week is off to a spectacularly bad start. Rather than be rained out like everyone else, the sun came out just long enough last Sunday to tease us all with shiny happiness and to force my softball team to play their scheduled game on a wet, muddy field. During the second inning I slipped and fell while attempting to barehand the ball after spinning and stumbling awkwardly toward second base from the pitcher's rubber. The result was a severely jammed right pinky. Loyal Stave It Off readers will know that I have just recovered from a dislocated left ring finger. So now I have another hot-dog finger (purple and swollen.) I'm attempting to heal by doing less things with my pinky. I'm trying to use other fingers for all those typical pinky tasks. Typing P's, question marks and semi colons is particularly difficult. Then on Monday I attempted to help a stranger load a large metal desk into a pickup truck. My good deed was rewarded as I promptly sliced open my left palm on a jagged metal corner. If I get a couple of foot wounds and maybe some bleeding around my forehead I'll declare myself Jesus by Friday.

Also disturbing is this horrible song that I can't get out of my head:

I met Ferdinand de Saussure on a night like this.
On Love, he said, I’m not so sure
I even know what it is.
No understanding, no closure.
It is a nemesis.
You can’t use a bulldozer
to study orchids he said,
So, we don’t know anything about love.

The same song later references Holland-Dozier-Holland, who clearly didn't know what Love was about either. HDH can join the club I guess. _Bodily Injury

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At 5/24/2005 10:58:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

No, you can't use a bulldozer to study orchids, but you can use a tweezer to study a redwood, or a volcano. Hey, I think I know what love is about (though I haven't written a song about it), but if I can't find it with either a bulldozer or a tweezer, does that mean it doesn't exist or am I truly fucked up?
Hot-dog fingers and sausage toes...such naughty donkeys have we.


At 5/26/2005 06:30:00 PM, Blogger walaka said...

Jesus by Friday would be a great name for a band.


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